Books like The Peculiar Memories of Thomas Penman

\ Maurice threw another log on and a mass of brilliant sparks leapt in the air like burning confetti.'You know what I'd like now?' he said, without taking his eyes off the fire. 'A pot of tea on top of that and a shag.'Thomas agreed.'Do you realize it can take up to a year of constant shagging for a girl to achieve orgasm?'He didn't, but went along with the prognosis. After all, Maurice had had an experience in the park.\ Here we examine the days and nights of young Thomas Penman as he ages from thirteen to a suave, sophisticated fifteen. Listening to the advice of Maurice is just one of his mistakes. His time is spent suffering through school, daydreaming of the delights embodied in the lovely Gwendolyn, helping his father deliver newspapers and searching tirelessly for his ailing grandfather's legendary porn collection. This book is strange - darkly, slyly funny but with a somewhat scary miasma hanging in the air. (Not to mention the smell of feces, both canine and human.)In addition to Grandpa's grave illness, Thomas's parents' long simmering marital strife is now coming to a full boil. It's a gloomy and depressing time to be in the house. Thomas, who has always feared his father's temper, begins to worry for his own well-being.\ . . . Thomas started stacking saucepans inside his bedroom door. He was worried that Rob might come in in the middle of the night and smoke him with the Beretta. Saucepans would at least give him a chance. The plan was to go straight out of the window, no hesitations; as the saucepans clattered he'd be out. And if Rob somehow navigated the precautions and got in silently to club or choke, Thomas had a back-up. He kept a permanently wired Black & Decker under the bed with a three-eighths masonry bit in the chuck. If Rob got on top of him he would drill a hole in the back of his head. There was also a three-foot wood saw in case of power-cuts. While being strangled, Thomas would attempt to saw his father's legs off.\ That last line made me burst out laughing, while cringing at the same time. No child should ever have to feel this way, but Thomas's over-the-top, Wylie Coyote-ish schemes to save his own life seem hilarious and yet realistic from a youngster's point of view. Plus, I love that he has a contingency plan in case the power goes out. The boy thinks of everything!I feel badly giving this only four stars as it was one of the better books I've read so far this year, but the unlikely romance between Thomas and Gwen annoyed me. The whole thing felt more fantastic than real and yes, (view spoiler)[I realize that Thomas's romp in the bluebells was meant to echo his grandfather's also rather mystical assignation (hide spoiler)]